Update

We got the news from Bug's social worker around 4:30 this evening that his grandparents were awarded custody. Our hearts have been on a roller coaster ride today and when I finally heard those words I felt something that I did not expect to feel: relief. 

I am relieved this day is OVER. What started out as an ordinary day quickly changed into one of the most emotionally difficult days I have had in quite a while. I was able to relax knowing what the heck was going on....the waiting was SO hard. 

I am relieved that Bug is going to be get to be with his family. No matter how much Bug loved us (and I know that he did), we were still unfamiliar, doing things he's never done and going places he had never been. Being with his family will bring him comfort, I'm sure. We pray that Bug feels loved, safe, secure, and no longer scared. 

I am also relieved that Bug is not going back to his parents yet. While, I really hope that someday his parents will get their act together and be reunited with Bug, I definitely didn't think 5 days was enough time to do that. I'm thankful that the judge thought the same thing. 

We really miss Bug so much. Like I said before, we love him, and it's hard to let go so quickly. We've spent the whole evening saying things that he would've been saying and laughing about how cute/funny he was. We packed up his stuff and wrote him a little note that I hope someone will read to him telling him how much fun we had with him and how special and wonderful we think he is. Someone from DCFS will come pick up his things in the morning, and all we will have left are the sweet memories (and the huge carton of goldfish that I bought for him). I told Andrew tonight "we will never, ever forget him". It's true, we wont. 

We went out to dinner tonight as a family to celebrate the difference that Bug made in our lives, and the fact that we now know that we can do this. We made it through our first placement! While Bug will always have a little piece of our hearts with him, we are excited to invite more in. 

I'm not finished processing all these emotions. It's hard to really know exactly what your heart is feeling when there are so many different things going on inside of it. I'm happy for Bug, sad for us, but also full of anticipation of what's in store. I guess the one feeling that I can settle on is HOPE. Because we all have it, no matter what, there's always hope. 

Thanks for joining us on this journey. 

Bug was so timid and scared at first at the pool, he gained a lot of courage & trust there and ended up jumping to Andrew many, many, many times 

Playin' together.  

This boy LOVED "his puppy". The first night he was with us, Banjo was the only one who could comfort him.